the highs and lows of a shoe addict...

I was so ridiculously excited about going to the Tony Bianco $60 shoe sale this morning. I had adrenalin pumping through my veins in anticipation of treating myself to a pair of sexy new heels. I admit I am a heelaholic, it's totally silly how much my heart races at the thought of new shoes. 

But then came the massive anti climax, sulk, panic, minor tantrum, then crashing low... Grrrr!!! I didn't buy ANYTHING!!! 

The Tony Bianco store didn't have any stilettos! Just open toe boots (sorry toes and boots don't mix in my opinion, unless you're an 18 year old supermodel), big platform wedges (to reminiscent of polio correctional shoes), low heeled sandals (boring granny style) and SHOES THAT I ALREADY HAVE! So bloody disappointed. I could have bought the black 'Alamo' but I love them more in the tan pair I already own!

In the end I bought four pairs of 'on-the-rebound' shoes, because I HAD TO BUY SOMETHING! They are everyday, wearable shoes that I only bought because they were marked down to $8 a pair! Yes, $8 a pair! From a shop called City Chic. Good brands too, all leather (or soft suede) from Robert Robert, Diavolina and Basque. But I'm still sulking. Immature I know. I'll be alright in the morning...

Diavolina wedge, Basque wedge, Diavolina court, Robert Robert chunky heel

today I am wearing...

The boyfriend jean. Loose, straight legged and super comfy. Yep. My latest quickie obsession. Guess where they're from? COLES! I tried them whilst doing the food shop on Sunday afternoon (a quick pull on under my dress, in front of the mirror, due to the no changing room issue). But I put them back on the rack. But then I couldn't stop thinking about them! So I went back on Tuesday morning and bought them! I'm so pleased I did. An f-ing bargain for $25 (I only paid $15 due to a FlyBuys discount, so happy days)! They are such a nice colour and an excellent quality soft denim.  

A must buy peeps! S'okay, I don't mind if we play jeans snap.

Mix Apparel 'boyfriend' jeans a change of season must buy!

zombie Tilda

Oooo I can't wait to see the new stylish, arty vampire film, Only Lovers Left Alive, starring Tilda Swinton and Tom Hiddleston! It looks so dark and slick and sounds like it has a fab soundtrack...

As always Tilda looks brilliant. I love the bit in the trailer where she sucks on a bloody icy pole! Is there anyone else as cool and other worldly as Ms Swinton?  Watch the trailer below and get excited...

Only Lovers Left Alive

Ummm I love sucking on a bloody pole...

Tilda's hungy face

today I am wearing...

I haven't done a what-I'm-wearing post for a while. I've been good, I've resisted the shops. It's too hard to clothes/shoe shop during the school holidays. The kids have been off for almost two months, but back to school today, so life can go back to normal... With it the good (coffee with girlfriends, relaxing shopping trips and peace) and the bad (horrible early mornings, packed lunches to make and the school runs, ugh). 

I did buy two dresses over the holiday period though and this is one of them, from Portmans (the other one is from Cue). I like the blue/green palm print and easy fit and flare style. It was $49 marked down from $99. 

Portmans palm print dress with Windsor Smith sandals

Grammy top of the frocks

Easy winners! A tie! Too hard to choose between Taylor Swift's beautiful Gucci dress and Chrissy Teigen's gorgeous Johanna Johnson simmering gold gown! 

I love them both (the dresses that is)!

SJP shoes

It was only a matter of time before Sarah Jessica Parker brought out her own shoe collection. Being the official Sex And The City shoe queen, I had high (ish) hopes. After all, the actress herself mingles with designers, is known to go a little left of centre with her attire, wears couture, usually looks pretty cool.

But WTF? Who are these shoes designed for? The over 50s?!

The heels are all wrong - they taper in and aren't straight and sexy. 

Not only are the designs totally unoriginal and some, bloody ugly, I can buy them all already at my local granny shoe shop!!! SJP cannot have had anything to do with the design of these shoes! But apparently she designed them 'using inspiration from her life, like little bows and flower accents...' Ummm, I'm not convinced.

Disappointed!

Available online at www.nordstrom.com, priced between US$195-$500.

The only pair I like! Navy 50s style wearable heels.

Granny style!

Ugly clogs!

Bridesmaid shoes.

I HATE these. That bowed ankle strap is crap!

My mum would wear these for a night out!

I have no words for how much I loathe these!!!

The best thing about these is the inner sole!

Boring! Just boring and been done before.

tits t shirt

I soooo want one of these!

Vivienne Westwood's Tits T-Shirt! Originally designed in 1975 for Vivienne and Malcolm's SEX shop, it's been reprinted for the Special Edition Collection, available at the World's End, London store, or online (for $125). 

Cool! I wonder who's boobs they are, they look a little implanty to me... no matter!

Beauty and the... bland?

She really is gorgeous isn't she. Cate Blanchett. Rarely puts a fashion foot wrong, never makes a silly faux pas, always chooses meaty acting roles that challenge her endless abilities. 

Umm... I wonder what she looks like naked? How her boobs have held up (or not) after three kids... Did she have c-sections or does she have to work on her pelvic floor? Does she enjoy anal sex? Or prefer creamy plain vanilla?

But my biggest question (and yes, I know I am being shallow and mean, but, don't lie and tell me the thought hasn't crossed your mind!) is this - what the fuck does she see in husband Andrew Upton?!!!

I know looks don't count (actually that's bollocks, of course they do), and he may have been trim when they met, and yes, he's creative and a playwright and has intellectual talents, but, but, BUT!!!

Do they have an open marriage perhaps? Can they both take pleasure elsewhere as long as the heart stays loyal? Ummm. I wonder.

I mean, there are sooo many talented, sexy, handsome men out there... Just look at the hot actors Cate mingles with! The directors, scriptwriters... She must get tempted, she must!

Or maybe her aloof, cool ice queen demeanour scares them all away.

It's fascinating...isn't it?!

She's a better woman than me (in oh so many ways!) I would have dumped him after my first Oscar nomination and had a string of decedent, passionate, intense flings then settled down with someone who was my aesthetic equal... 

SAGs the worst

Not doing it for me. Not doing it for me at all. 

Clare Danes looks like she's in a school play. Mariah looks like a 90s prostitute. Ms Matthew McConaughey looks like she's draped herself in a cheap shiny mustard bedsheet (and I just can't stand Camillia's bloody eyebrows)! Kerry Washington looks ridiculous, like an overstuffed doll (yes, yes, I know she's up the duff and normally looks flawless). Sandy Bullock is wrapped in a Quality Street mint-chic wrapper (with boring shoes), and finally Cate perfect Blanchett looks like she's wearing the downstairs loo towel holder.

Very disappointed.

SAGs the best

Here's my favs...

Sorry, I haven't got time to write. Busy, busy, busy me. You know who all these lovely ladies are, you don't need captions.  So in no particular order...these ladies look lovely.

fancy a bendersnatch?

Ooooo yes please! As you may be aware I have a bit of a thing for Micheal Fassbender, and yes I admit it, for Benedict Cumbersnatch too! I would happily accommodate both of these charming young men for a playful hour or two (actually it would probably only need to be 20 minutes)! 

Both such intense, talented actors, and having seen MB's goods already (courtesy of the film Shame) I just know it would be a total thrill! Just look at them here (okay I'm not keen on the beard Michael, too ginger, rough and scratchy...) grooving together at the Globes After Party! Naughty, naughty boys. I wish I'd been there, between them both, merry from Moët and up for a quickie in an alley somewhere... What?! A girl can dream right!

the not so golden globes...

Here's the 'oh dear' list... Not good looks pretty ladies.  Not good looks at all...

Doesn't Heidi Klum seem to just pop up 

everywhere these days? Was she even invited? 

She looks a tad cowgirl/home applique/

skank in this Marchesa ensemble. Too much.

This is what happens when you cross artificial
flowers from a retro swim cap with a 90s sleeveless
jacket made out of an old shower curtain! Sorry
Ms Bejo, it's a "No" from me.

Zoe, Zoe, Zoe. Very disapointed!  Positives first.  

Love the shoes! Louboutin Pigalles. Smart choice.  

The dress however? YUK!  What the hell is it?! Awful.

Prabal Gurung, you were obviously pissed when you 

designed this one! Playgroup sticky craft table gone 

horribly wrong...

Julia hon, I knew you'd wear something safe, 

but why oh why did you wreck the classic D&G 

strapless dress with an old fucking business shirt?!

It just makes me angry ANGRY!

Front view of Emma Watson's boring back to front dress...

Back view of this bizarre combo. Leggings?!

Easy access for a quick shag at the after party

perhaps, that might work...

Paula Patton thought her bedsheets would make a 

good over the shoulder throw/snuggie... handy if she gets 

bored or too drunk and nods off.

Dior was obviously having an off day when he designed this dull number. 

What's with the hip band? They way it bags out in a puff around the arse.

Ugh. Ugly, boring, way too meringue like. 

And Jen PLEASE grow back our hair!

golden globes

I've been off blogging for a bit. Christmas and New Year and my Dad finally passing away into his endless sleep all got in the way and to be honest I just didn't feel like it or have much to say...

But it's the Golden Globes!

Of course I'm watching! I love the glitz and glamour. All the lovely dresses and stars. How can I resist selecting my favourite red carpet looks?! So far I must say I haven't seen any shockers (actually Jen Law looks the a meringue - very disappointing!). 

Here are my top looks (in no particular order)...

Sofia does old time big busted glamour beautifully in this over-the-top-but-I-love-it, 

Zac Posen gown. And that necklace? It looks fabulous nestled above those

quivering, don't you want to rest your face in them, boobs!

Emma Roberts gets 10/10.  I LOVE IT ALL! Perfect.

Kate Beckinsale never puts a foot wrong. Love this hot metallic strapless 

Zuhair Murad dress.



Classy ice queen Cate looks simply perfect in Armani Prive.

Amy Adams, my girl crush, I love you Miss Hottie, in Valentino



Lovely Leslie Mann all coy and ready to be unwrapped!

Lupia Nyong'o simple and stunning in red Ralph Lauren.



Sandra Bullock looking flawless in Prabal Gurung. Didn't like it at first but now I do, 
it moves beautifully and sets her cleavage off a treat (even if it is a bit 
Liquorice Allsort inspired...)